Battling the Blues, Therapy, and Hormones

Hey there, friends! Welcome back to the next chapter in my quest for a happier and healthier life. If you've been following along, you'll remember that in the last blog post, I'd just been diagnosed with hypertension, and I was starting to see some improvements in my daily life. My heart wasn't pounding in my chest anymore, but something was still off. Well, let me fill you in on what's been happening since then.

So, there I was, feeling better but still stuck in this persistent "blah" feeling. I had been talking to my mom about it, and she suggested I look into researching antidepressant medications and possibly giving them a try. At first, I wasn't entirely sold on the idea, but after some contemplation, prayer, and conversations with some amazing people in my life, I decided to bring it up with my OBGYN during my next appointment.

We decided that I would start on a low dose of Paxil, and let me tell you, it was like a cloud had lifted. Suddenly, I had increased libido, I wasn't as edgy, I was kinder and more patient with my family, and I had more energy. It seemed like my problems were over!

With this newfound energy and zest for life, I decided to take a few more steps to work on myself. First, I started going on more walks. Being out in nature did wonders for clearing my mind and boosting my mood. It's amazing what a little fresh air and sunshine can do.

But that wasn't all. In addition to Paxil and my outdoor adventures, I decided to seek guidance from a Christian counselor. I set up a profile on BetterHelp.com and found Mary Jo, who turned out to be an amazing therapist. Having someone to share my feelings with, knowing they weren't judging me, but simply listening, was incredibly therapeutic. I needed that more than I realized.

With Mary Jo's help, I worked through my fears, learned how to communicate better with my family, and tackled some past issues that I had buried deep down. BetterHelp was perfect for me because I could talk to her from the comfort of my own home while sipping on my morning coffee. It felt easier, and there were no excuses. I had to be there and work on myself.

Next up on my self-improvement journey was a visit to a dietitian. I figured if I'm going to recommend something to my clients, I should try it first. Plus, seeking help in all areas of life, even one you feel confident in, can be beneficial. The dietitian gave me invaluable advice about my daily habits, well-balanced meal ideas, and nutritious snacks.

I think a lot of people tend to try the latest fad diet before seeking professional help. But let me tell you, for long-term success, you have to make lifestyle changes, and that's where professionals can guide you. I'm no doctor or dietitian, but I do know that trends promising quick results often lead to regaining the lost weight and don't address the root causes.

Fast forward to March 2023, and I can say I'm in a better place than I was in 2020. But, and there's always a "but," I'm noticing a lot of weight gain around my midsection, an unusual desire to nap (I'm not usually a napper), and I still don't think I feel "normal" (whatever that means anymore). As a Personal Trainer, I felt like a failure and an imposter. I'd look in the mirror with disgust, and one time, my husband found me in the closet crying because a pair of jeans that recently fit wouldn't even button.

I questioned if it was my own fault for wearing stretchy pants all the time and indulging in delicious chocolate cake. Was I drinking too much? These questions were on a constant loop in my head. I realized it wasn't healthy to keep them to myself. (Oh, and did I mention that I took the summer off from therapy because I thought I was doing so well? Lesson learned: get back on Mary Jo's schedule.)

One day, during lunch with a friend, we were sharing our troubles, and to my surprise, she mentioned experiencing some of the same symptoms I had been struggling with. While I wasn't happy that she was going through this too, it was comforting not to feel so alone in my journey. She went on to explain that she received a weekly testosterone shot due to her low hormone levels. Her wealth of information piqued my interest, and I eagerly inquired about the clinic she visited. Encouraged by the possibility of finding answers, I decided to schedule a bloodwork appointment in the hopes that it might lead me down a similar path.

So here I am, caught up to the point in my life where I'm battling those dang hormones. Stay tuned for part 3 in this series! And oh, if you haven't already, check out the podcast from Mel Robbins that I've linked here. It's incredibly enlightening!

Until next time...

YES YOU CAN,

Morgan